25 Sunday Nov 2012
Posted in poetry
Baffling burlesque,
baroquely enveloping hurricane.
Satirical reality
quickly expanded-
the khaki surge suggests
openly female threatening.
Second defense launching,
recuperating frantically.
Nothing spreads,
provoking rises worship entertaining.
Collapsed longing idea,
a secret,
necessary to cherish
the reminder force-
flowers, life, anything.
Language desire happened.
Writing gathers
reversible silence-
a dream.
People and Trends
Just another human being who's trying to reach new levels of consciousness.
"...one discovers that there is in it after all, a place for the genuine." ~ Marianne Moore
Poetic Landscapes Of The Spirit
"free-verse" poetry from the soul
Poetry and Prose By and About Charles Bukowski
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Listen, are you breathing just a little, and calling it a life? ― Mary Oliver
Letters from Edinburgh to Manila, and Back
What you did not build up, you cannot tear down.
Not sure what methodology you used here, but it works in dislocating the language. I like “recuperating frantically” and “the khaki surge” especially.
You know what I did? The other day I picked up the current issue of the New Yorker, solely for use as a source text.
This poem came out of a commentary written about the whole Petraeus affair (“Military Secrets” by Adam Gopnik, Nov 26 issue, pp. 19-20).
What I did was go through the text and circle words that struck me, then cross out the rest. I put the remaining words in order into the word processor on my Droid, and arranged them essentially based on sound. I read it aloud from the magazine a couple times to get the rhythm down. I changed a verb tense here or there and maybe added a “the”.
“openly female threatening” struck me as dangerous. It was the line with which I was the most uncomfortable. I elected to leave it unchanged thinking of John Cage’s comment about using the I Ching- paraphrasing, he says you have to trust the guidance of the I Ching and use the result no matter what, or else you have no business consulting the I Ching. Following the same logic, if I don’t trust the process that gave me such an evocative (and provocative) line, and therefore delete the line, I defeat the purpose of using an aleatoric method, which is to (in Cage’s mind) remove the feelings and judgments of the author from the work, letting nature create her own work. (Although this still strikes me as an unrealistic ideal, the point is well taken).
So I nodded my head to Cage and nature and left the line in.
I was playing with the I Ching this morning, asking it what I should write. It told me to pay attention to details…
Very interesting. Your scribbled up New Yorker page is a work of art in itself. And I liked “openly female threatening.” It delivers a punch. I’m glad you left it in. I like the poem even more with this background and another reading or two.
Thanks
I was doing this at a table with a bunch of family members, including my wife. They we watching me like I was crazy, wondering what the hell I was doing.